Do you wish you could stop doom scrolling?

Do you wish you could stop doom scrolling?

We've all been sucked into this nasty little habit of scrolling mindlessly through our phones. It's so commonplace now that it even has its own cute little nickname 'doom scrolling'.

Do you wish you could stop?

I've discovered a neat trick to break free from this addictive pattern and I'm going to share it with you now. It's a powerful reframe.

You're not doom scrolling, you're hope scrolling.

One day I was going through my phone and driving myself insane finding nothing remotely interesting when I suddenly stopped. I always hated the term 'doom scrolling'. It felt hopeless and shaming and that's the last thing anyone needs. I knew I needed the opposite so, instead I asked myself:

What are you really hoping to find?

The answer was clear, literally: I have no idea.

But I persevered. I said to myself: You're looking for something? What is it?

Again I got nothing. My mind was a complete blank.

Asking a better question

I realised I needed a better question so I tried: If anything were possible, what miracle do you wish would happen right now?

This stopped me in my tracks. For the first time I felt a litle lighter. Just asking the question opened my mind a little and it felt good, spacious.

I sat with the question for a bit, asking some nuanced versions of it to see if that helped...

- If you could receive one message right now, who would it be from and what would it say?
- If you could receive one opportunity right now, with no effort or strings attached, what would it be?
- If you could get help right now from someone you trust, what would you want help with and who from?

Slowly answers came. It wasn't immediate or flowing; it felt like waking up from a restless sleep. 

My first answers were things like: apology texts from people who upset me in the past; old friends reconnecting; an inbox full of new clients; an invitation to a really fun event and a chauffeur-driven car coming to fetch me; a savings account with six zeros...

That is just an example of the sort of stuff that came up for me.

Facing your desires

It was quite confronting becoming aware of the things that matter to me; things I'm wishing for but feeling unworthy of; stuff I'd love to do if it was easier or I had support; things I've been putting off; memories I'm carrying around un-processed.

We talk about facing our fears but sometimes it's just as scary to face our desires.

It was confronting but also liberating. The mess in my head, which I was escaping through scrolling, was quieter and I could think more clearly.

A beginning and an end

So this was obviously just the beginning of a whole new conversation with myself. Once I'd uncovered what I was really hope scrolling for, next I needed a strategy (or a truck load of them) to find a way to give myself what I really want or to ask for it.

It was daunting but that's because it's just a beginning... but it's also an end - of doom scrolling.

Until the next time

Unless I burn all my devices and throw them in the sea (tempting), there will be a next time. I'm aware this isn't a way to avoid doom scrolling atogether, but one way to stop it in its tracks - a diversion to something ultimately more satisfying: hope scrolling.

Thanks for reading. :)

Hope scrolling step-by-step

For the time or attention-challenged, here's a condesced guide to hope scrolling in 11 fun steps.

1. Notice you're doom scrollling
2. Pause
3. Reframe it as 'hope scrolling'
4. Let go of the shame of scrolling and feel the relief which comes from recognising it as hope instead.
5. Ask yourself 'What am I hoping will happen?'
6. Allow yourself to dream of a genuine miracle?
7. Feel the pleasure in being back in touch with your true hopes, dreams and deisres.
8. Do whatever it takes to move one step closer to make your miracle and reality.
9. Seriously, take one baby step.
10. Congratulate yourself for breaking the habit and getting your mind back.
11. Rinse repeat.

Or simply grab this graphic to remind you...

'Smart' technology is the real problem

Yes, our so-called smart technology is the real issue here. And yes, I wish we could do something about the design of our devices and apps which make them so addictive in the first place but that's a battle for someone else (which thankfully is being fought even as we speak). But let's not take on the machine today. For now, let's fight the battle we can fight and get our minds - and our thumbs back!